Ron White Quotes

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.

Ron White 



The next time you have a thought... let it go.
Ron White  





I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability.
Ron White 



I didn't get where I am today by worryin' about how I'd feel tomorrow.
Ron White  



People are saying that I'm an alcoholic, and that's not true, because I only drink when I work, and I'm a workaholic.
Ron White 



Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty... mine's putting in an express lane.
Ron White  



You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered.
Ron White 



I do live like a rock star, but it's not as great as it sounds. It's a lot of traveling.
Ron White  



Diamonds - that'll shut her up... for a minute!
Ron White 



Anybody could say anything they want about me, and it literally never penetrates my skin.
Ron White  



I was considered by my peers to be a good comedian. So that's all I ever strived to do was get some recognition from my peers.
Ron White 



I've never been one to look up the ladder. I've always looked down the ladder. As long as there's one guy down there, I'm fine.
Ron White 



There have been times in my life that I've had a ton of vices, and my demons have run amok for years and years and years.
Ron White 



There were years when I was a beer and tequila guy, then I got real fat. And then I found that you could actually go on a diet and drink scotch. Then I got hooked on scotch, and if you get hooked on scotch, then everything else just tastes wrong.
Ron White 



Everybody I know is a joke writer.
Ron White 



I'd rather do a really good small part than a really bad big part.
Ron White 



I've got a great cigar collection - it's actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn't going to smoke every last one of 'em.
Ron White